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Post by formatcyes on Jul 30, 2014 18:29:04 GMT -6
Ok little nervous posting anything here because you guys/girls are so awesome. This is not a completed song just a rough draft. Having some lyric trouble here and wondering if there are any suggestions? https%3A//soundcloud.com/zappuppys/runIn the chorus/hook "Don't lie Ill find our the truth" it doesn't work. Really stuck HELP. The singer wrote most of the lyrics but we cannot get round this. If anyone wants to do the bass or any other instrument ( I suck balls at the bass ) shout out  .. |
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Post by Johnkenn on Jul 31, 2014 13:52:01 GMT -6
I'll take a listen here in a little while...
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Post by kcatthedog on Jul 31, 2014 17:41:04 GMT -6
V1
I'm making my way,
through the crowd to you
I'll push right through
v2
I'm going to climb
these stairs of hell
just to find you
pre chorus
I'll make it happen, I
just me and you
CHorus
don't run, don't hide from me
don't mind, I'll find the truth
don't run, don't hide from me
don't run, don't run from me
don't run from me
I think these are interesting and the singer could go a couple of places with this:
1 straight on love song she is crazy about the subject
2 straight on love song, crazy about the subject but what is the subject lieing about ? their feelings for the singer or has something been going on on the side ?
3 love song twilight zone singer is nutz compulsive stalking somebody who is literally trying to get away from them
I wouldn't worry about the chorus but about developing the story
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Post by formatcyes on Jul 31, 2014 21:15:06 GMT -6
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Posts: 0
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Post by Deleted on Aug 2, 2014 10:01:30 GMT -6
I don't like the melody on "I'll find the truth" she needs to go up on the word truth and hold it. I'd record an example but it's too early for me to talk never mind attempt to sing. Someone more competent can probably interpret this idea and explain it better. She has a good voice, chorus definitely needs some harmony and the drum track needs to open up more in the chorus. my 2cents.
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