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Post by carymiller on Dec 19, 2022 14:32:59 GMT -6
I took a lot of time off from audio/engineering/production and even songwriting/performance when I got with my Partner 7 years ago. I wound up closing my studio in Tempe, and swapping to software development, but always kept a PTHD Ultimate "mini" home studio going (never really stopped writing but...it slowed my output a bunch). However, during this time I stopped performing and was helping to raise her kids at the time too. Since she died...I've had a really hard year, but I've been writing and recording a lot. It's kind of auto-reflexive. Nothing else seems to help. Two of my best friends also passed in the last three years, and my mother died a few months after Shannon passed. And her kids went with her son's biological father...so, it's been this really weird situation where I just feel isolated. I played my first live show in nearly 8 years a few months ago. All originals to about 45 people...and it kind of inspired me to keep going. We recorded the audio off the board for the show, and people really engaged with the music. I wrote this song about grief called "Family We Choose" and tracked a 32 part real string section for the song. I'm thinking about releasing it as a single. Paul David Hager mixed it and killed it. I dunno...I'd love to hear...some kind of feedback. I have no idea what the musical landscape is like lately. But I'm not sure I'll ever love like that again...and the music, again is the only thing that's helping. I just want to know if this sounds like I'm on the right track. I've always been open about mental health issues (being Bipolar), but this is just...a different level of challenging. I feel like the music is the only thing that brings me any real joy of late. Family We Choose (Paul David Hager Mix) Unmastered <---LINK HERE!! |
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Post by thehightenor on Dec 19, 2022 15:09:25 GMT -6
I'm so sorry for your loss - I can't imagine how tough it must be.
I just listened to your track and really enjoyed listening to it.
It's a song full of genuine feeling and emotion and that comes across in the music.
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Post by carymiller on Dec 19, 2022 15:31:47 GMT -6
I'm so sorry for your loss - I can't imagine how tough it must be. I just listened to your track and really enjoyed listening to it. It's a song full of genuine feeling and emotion and that comes across in the music. Thank you! I'm just trying to figure out the best direction with this stuff. I'm getting 10 more songs mixed and mastered next...and then we'll be tracking 20-40 more tunes over the next year or two, depending on how it shakes out. This song started as a bedroom recording. Though I imagine not everyone has Pro Tools Ultimate in their bedroom lol. All those deaths, they each are complicated losses...and going through them all in a row was just...like nothing else I've ever been through. With Shannon's loss in particular I've been super distraught. For half a year I didn't know up from down! Grief is really hard to express without getting stuck inside of it. And I wasn't sure if I could write a song that could tackle the subject tastefully. Initially I was writing a lot of stuff that came out angry...and I'm not sure that's the right way to go about it...at least not at first. I'm not sure what kind of industry still exists, but I'm going to start small and figure some things out from there. |
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Post by geoff738 on Dec 24, 2022 16:24:22 GMT -6
I’m really sorry for all your loss. That’s a lot of stuff you’ve had to endure.
I like the tune. Keep going with the music!
Cheers,
Geoff
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Post by carymiller on Dec 24, 2022 22:04:32 GMT -6
I’m really sorry for all your loss. That’s a lot of stuff you’ve had to endure. I like the tune. Keep going with the music! Cheers, Geoff Thank you Geoff, that means a lot. |
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Post by gravesnumber9 on Dec 31, 2022 14:25:29 GMT -6
Tough subject. Great vibe on the song and impressive work on the string arrangement in particular. Almost has a Pogues vibe.
I also set a lot of music stuff aside about 8 years ago for what was supposed to be a temporary hiatus but, thanks to what seemed like a never-ending series of tragedies and disasters (family and friends dying, financial collapses, etc... you know, the usual) it turned into a much longer break.
All I can tell you is that a little over a year ago I started writing my own stuff again and it was like reuniting with an old friend. It sounds like you're been doing a lot of writing and playing too which is such a healthy thing.
I wanted to share something that I've concluded for myself that might help you.
You mention that you don't really know where the musical landscape is these days. For me, coming back at this 8 years later (8 calendar years but about 50 years in terms of learned experience, seriously... we should talk some time) I've decided that I want to stop chasing the tail of what people will think about my music. I've moved to doing it the way I did it when I was like 16 years old which is making the music I think sounds cool with zero regard for if anyone else will ever like it.
That's actually harder than I thought it would be because my wife and a good portion of my old bandmates, fans, and friends don't like the music I'm making now! But I think I'm on the right track because there are others that are really affected by it. I floated a demo around a few months ago and (on the same track!) got feedback ranging from "dude, I gotta tell you this song sucks" to "this is easily the best thing I've ever heard you do, hands down."
So what's my point?
You've experienced enough of the world's lemons to not give a shit about what other people think of you. And if there's one thing has always been attractive in American music, it's people that don't give a shit about what anyone thinks. So do your thing brother! And feel free to send me tracks for feedback, I'm not nice but I WILL listen!
Here's to an amazing 2023 for all of us getting back in the game.
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Post by ab101 on Jan 2, 2023 22:13:58 GMT -6
carymiller - I am so sorry about your loss. I am praying for the comfort of her soul as well as your comfort as a mourner. May her memory always be a blessing and an inspiration for your endeavors.
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Post by carymiller on Jan 4, 2023 5:48:18 GMT -6
I’m really sorry for all your loss. That’s a lot of stuff you’ve had to endure. I like the tune. Keep going with the music! Cheers, Geoff Also, it's been a privilege to find a sense of community on this board again too. |
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Post by carymiller on Jan 4, 2023 6:04:21 GMT -6
Tough subject. Great vibe on the song and impressive work on the string arrangement in particular. Almost has a Pogues vibe. I also set a lot of music stuff aside about 8 years ago for what was supposed to be a temporary hiatus but, thanks to what seemed like a never-ending series of tragedies and disasters (family and friends dying, financial collapses, etc... you know, the usual) it turned into a much longer break. All I can tell you is that a little over a year ago I started writing my own stuff again and it was like reuniting with an old friend. It sounds like you're been doing a lot of writing and playing too which is such a healthy thing. I wanted to share something that I've concluded for myself that might help you. You mention that you don't really know where the musical landscape is these days. For me, coming back at this 8 years later (8 calendar years but about 50 years in terms of learned experience, seriously... we should talk some time) I've decided that I want to stop chasing the tail of what people will think about my music. I've moved to doing it the way I did it when I was like 16 years old which is making the music I think sounds cool with zero regard for if anyone else will ever like it. That's actually harder than I thought it would be because my wife and a good portion of my old bandmates, fans, and friends don't like the music I'm making now! But I think I'm on the right track because there are others that are really affected by it. I floated a demo around a few months ago and (on the same track!) got feedback ranging from "dude, I gotta tell you this song sucks" to "this is easily the best thing I've ever heard you do, hands down." So what's my point? You've experienced enough of the world's lemons to not give a shit about what other people think of you. And if there's one thing has always been attractive in American music, it's people that don't give a shit about what anyone thinks. So do your thing brother! And feel free to send me tracks for feedback, I'm not nice but I WILL listen! Here's to an amazing 2023 for all of us getting back in the game. Hey Graves, you can PM me any time to swap phone numbers or something if you wanna talk shop with gear, or songwriting, or grief. I get it. And thank you for the kind words about the music (love the Pogues). I keep getting comparisons to The Pogues, Smashing Pumpkins, and The Verve (Bittersweet Symphony) with this one. A lot of really kind assessments that make me think I was on the right track with it. I love that mentality (of playing like you're 16)! I've been trying to find the innocence of what makes something fun to play again. That's been a big focus. My thoughts on if people hate or love something...if they're at least reacting to something you're making real art. It's when something bland evokes very little by way of an emotional reaction that you wind up in that "Muzak" territory John Lennon feared. As for what people think...I dunno. I don't have much bandwidth for people who treat music as disposable these days. I know people here actually care about music, so that's why I put this out here to be listened to. Also, I feel the song explains my grief better than I can articulate it personally. There's a lot of tunes on the horizon, and I'm not trying to beat a dead horse with subject matter...but I felt at the time/still do, that there aren't many great songs about this subject in a general sense. So hopefully I'm on the right track with Family We Choose. I'm an atheist, but I felt really blessed in a sense to get to work with the musicians we got on that track. And Paul is an incredible mixer. He really just nailed it. So, we'll keep going from here. Next up is finishing the new home studio out. |
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Post by carymiller on Jan 4, 2023 6:07:28 GMT -6
carymiller - I am so sorry about your loss. I am praying for the comfort of her soul as well as your comfort as a mourner. May her memory always be a blessing and an inspiration for your endeavors. Thank you Ab...I really appreciate that. I really do hope there is something beyond all this and that she's doing OK. I'm not religious...but I do believe in energy. She was an incredible woman...beautiful, brilliant, and funny as hell. I just miss having my partner...but she would tell me to keep going. |
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Post by Ward on Jan 5, 2023 17:55:11 GMT -6
OMG I am so sorry to read this. My deepest condolences, Cary.
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Post by carymiller on Jan 5, 2023 20:56:43 GMT -6
OMG I am so sorry to read this. My deepest condolences, Cary. Thanks Ward. It means a lot. I hope things are well with you. |
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Post by Ward on Jan 6, 2023 12:13:38 GMT -6
OMG I am so sorry to read this. My deepest condolences, Cary. Thanks Ward. It means a lot. I hope things are well with you. Things are going pretty well Cary. Doing a lot of pre-production on some upcoming projects, writing the music for another game show (kill me but it pays the bills), some songwriting for artists that live 2000-3000 miles away from me etc, and the family seems good for now, even though 3 of the 5 kids live 'away'. Such is life. Life isn't stagnant or boring! |
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Post by seawell on Jan 7, 2023 15:31:10 GMT -6
carymiller I'm so sorry to hear about what you've had to go through! Music is such a powerful friend, I'm so glad to hear you're getting out there and playing live. Especially playing originals, there's something so magical and healing about it, baring your soul like that. I pray every day gets a little easier for you as you move forward. I really enjoyed your song, very heartfelt 🙏🏼❤️
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Post by carymiller on Jan 7, 2023 16:04:02 GMT -6
carymiller I'm so sorry to hear about what you've had to go through! Music is such a powerful friend, I'm so glad to hear you're getting out there and playing live. Especially playing originals, there's something so magical and healing about it, baring your soul like that. I pray every day gets a little easier for you as you move forward. I really enjoyed your song, very heartfelt 🙏🏼❤️ Hey Josh! How are you doing today? I hope you're starting to feel better! Thank you for the kind words...music is basically the glue that's been keeping me together this year, and 'Family We Choose' was like a bolt out of the blue when it was written and arranged. I'm really glad you enjoyed it. We have a lot more material to get to, but I felt this song was important. Also, Paul David Hager is just one of the best mixers in the world! Getting to work with him and get to know him a little was a real treat. None of this brings anyone back, but I feel like you have to live for the people who loved you. Life is so hard and short. People don't understand what a gift it is. |
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Post by seawell on Jan 7, 2023 16:57:21 GMT -6
carymiller I'm so sorry to hear about what you've had to go through! Music is such a powerful friend, I'm so glad to hear you're getting out there and playing live. Especially playing originals, there's something so magical and healing about it, baring your soul like that. I pray every day gets a little easier for you as you move forward. I really enjoyed your song, very heartfelt 🙏🏼❤️ Hey Josh! How are you doing today? I hope you're starting to feel better! Thank you for the kind words...music is basically the glue that's been keeping me together this year, and 'Family We Choose' was like a bolt out of the blue when it was written and arranged. I'm really glad you enjoyed it. We have a lot more material to get to, but I felt this song was important. Also, Paul David Hager is just one of the best mixers in the world! Getting to work with him and get to know him a little was a real treat. None of this brings anyone back, but I feel like you have to live for the people who loved you. Life is so hard and short. People don't understand what a gift it is. Hey Cary, thank you so much for asking. There is still a lot of up and down, feel a little better... so try to walk more..doh walked too much...OUCH. I'm trying to figure out the balance but a little better overall each day for sure. Keep writing and and sharing man, I look forward to hearing more! |
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